Chapter 9: Sexuality

Question 1

sexual attitudes over time

Answer 1

• 50 years ago, most people disapproved of premarital sex
• Now, most people believe that sex between unmarried people is fine as long as it occurs in the context of a committed, caring relationship

Question 2

hookups

Answer 2

sexual interactions with nonromantic partners that usually last one night and do not involve any expectation of a lasting relationship

Question 3

satisfaction with hookups

Answer 3

Both men and women usually have more positive than negative feelings after a hookup, but mixed feelings are common

Question 4

sexual attitudes in men vs. women

Answer 4

Men hold more permissive sexual values than women, although the difference is shrinking over time

Question 5

sexual double standard

Answer 5

women have been judged more harshly than men for being sexually experienced or permissive

Question 6

sexual attitudes in the U.S.

Answer 6

The U.S. holds relatively conservative sexual attitudes compared to other countries

Question 7

sexual attitudes by race

Answer 7

African Americans hold more permissive sexual attitudes than Whites, while Hispanic Americans and Asian Americans are more conservative

Question 8

atttiudes about same-sex sexuality

Answer 8

Most Americans are in favour of same-sex marriage

Question 9

Two reasons for changes in attitudes towards LGBTQ+ sexuality

Answer 9

• Greater visibility of LGBTQ+ people in public life
• We understand same-sex sexuality much better than we used to

Question 10

People are more likely to support same-sex sexuality if _____

Answer 10

they believe that people are born gay or lesbian than if they believe it is the way they “choose” to live

Question 11

origin of sexual orientation

Answer 11

Sexual orientation has a genetic basis

Question 12

evolutionary benefit of homosexuality

Answer 12

The sisters of gay men tend to have more children and children who receive greater care and protection, so it may have been evolutionarily advantageous for same-sex orientations to run in one’s family

Question 13

same-sex attitudes by demographic

Answer 13

African Americans, Republicans, religious people, and the elderly hold more anti-LGBTQ+ attitudes

Question 14

sex for the first time

Answer 14

• 17 is the average age of first intercourse
• The majority of teens have sex for the first time with someone who is a partner in a steady, emotionally important relationship
• Most teens find their first experience to be enjoyable, but men enjoy it a lot more
• Both men and women expect their first experience to be better than it turns out to be

Question 15

sex on the first date and relationship satisfaction

Answer 15

Couples who have sex on the first date experience less relationship satisfaction

Question 16

sex with casual partners and relation satisfaction

Answer 16

A pattern of sex with a casual partner is associated with greater tension in one’s relationships 4 years down the line

Question 17

impact of abstinence-focused sex education

Answer 17

Abstinence-focused sex education doesn’t work at reducing teen sex, but it reduces the use of contraception

Question 18

four common motives for sex

Answer 18

• Emotional
• Physical
• Pragmatic
• Insecurity

Question 19

gender differences in motivation for sex

Answer 19

• Men and women endorse emotional movies with equal frequency
• Men are more likely to have sex for physical, pragmatic, and insecure reasons

Question 20

marriage & cohabitation and the frequency of sex

Answer 20

• Married and cohabitating couples have sex more often than those who are single
• A steep drop in the frequency with which a couple has sex usually begins in the second year they live together
• This decreases further when they’re pregnant or have small children

Question 21

frequency of sex across generation

Answer 21

All couples are having less sex, on average, than our grandparents did when they were our age

Question 22

frequency of sex over time

Answer 22

• Sexual desire decreases with age
• Couples have the most sex during the first year of their relationship

Question 23

sex in gay vs. heterosexual couples

Answer 23

• Gay men have more sex with their partners than lesbians or heterosexuals do
• After 10 years together, all couples have sex less often, but the drop in frequency is greater for gays, such that they end up having sex less frequently than heterosexual couples do
• Lesbians have sex less often, but when they do, it is more satisfying

Question 24

number of sexual partners of men vs. women

Answer 24

• Men report having more sexual partners than women
• This may be due to sampling biases (not including prostitutes in studies)
• Men and women define sex differently; men are more likely to say they’ve had sex
• Men exaggerate the number of partners they’ve had, while women minimize them

Question 25

cybersex

Answer 25

involves sexual chat for the purpose of sexual gratification

Question 26

Extradyadic sex

Answer 26

having sex with someone other than one’s partner without the permission of one’s partner

Question 27

frequency of extradyadic sex

Answer 27

21% of women and 32% of men have been sexually unfaithful to their romantic partners at least once

Question 28

extradyadic sex and gender

Answer 28

Men are more likely to cheat because they have more positive attitudes toward causal sex and they often pursue extradyadic sex for the sake of sexual variety

Question 29

extradyadic sex in LGB couples

Answer 29

Gay men have more extradyadic sex than lesbian women and heterosexual men do

Question 30

Sociosexual orientations

Answer 30

the trait-like collection of beliefs and behaviours that describe our feelings about sex

Question 31

Restricted sociosexual orientation

Answer 31

people who are generally willing to have sex only in the context of a committed and affectionate relationship

Question 32

Unrestricted sociosexual orientation

Answer 32

people who are always on the prowl for new partners

Question 33

sociosexuality and extradyadic sex

Answer 33

Sociosexuality is associated with the likelihood that people have extradyadic sex

Question 34

distinguishing unrestricted vs. restricted people

Answer 34

- Observers can generally distinguish people with unrestricted vs. restricted orientations when their faces are side by side - Unrestricted women tend to have more masculine facial features. They are seen as more attractive, but men consider them to be less desirable as long-term mates - Unrestricted men look more masculine too, but women prefer the faces of restricted men for long-term mates

Question 35

influences of sexual selection on men

Answer 35

Sexual selection has favoured men who mate with as many women as possible

Question 36

good genes hypothesis

Answer 36

suggests that some women, particularly those with less desirable mates, can profit from a dual mating strategy in which they pursue long-term partners who will contribute resources to protect their offspring while seeking good genes for their children from other men

Question 37

evidence for the good genes hypothesis

Answer 37

- Women are more attracted to extradyadic mates when they’re fertile than when they’re not and this tendency is more pronounced when their primary partners are relatively more unattractive - 2% of the world’s children are being raised by men who don’t know that someone else is the child’s biological father

Question 38

sperm competition

Answer 38

occurs when the sperm of two or more men occupy a woman’s vagina at the same time

Question 39

adapting to sperm competition

Answer 39

Men have adapted to sperm competition: men who know that their partners are spending a lot of time with other men tend to have intercourse in a manner that is likely to displace any sperm that might be present

Question 40

when are people more likely to cheat?

Answer 40

More people cheat when they become dissatisfied with their present partners and the quality of their alternatives is high

Question 41

switching mates after an affair in women vs. men

Answer 41

Women are more likely to switch mates as a result of an affair

Question 42

psychology of cheaters

Answer 42

- Cheaters tend to be manipulative people who are high in Machiavellianism and psychopathy, low in agreeableness and conscientiousness and high in anxiety about abandonment - Cheaters are more likely than non-cheaters to cheat again

Question 43

Consensual non-monogamy (CNM)

Answer 43

an arrangement in which partners agree that it is acceptable to have more than one sexual or romantic relationship at the same time

Question 44

open relationship

Answer 44

partners feel free to have sex with others, but agree to avoid any romantic or emotional attachment to those other people

Question 45

swingers

Answer 45

pursue extradyadic sex as a couple

Question 46

polyamory

Answer 46

partners have full-fledged love affairs that may be both sexual and romantic with more than one person

Question 47

prevalence of CNM

Answer 47

⅕ of Americans have been in some form of CNM relationship in the past

Question 48

CNM by demographics

Answer 48

Women, heterosexuals, and those with restricted sociosexual orientations are less likely to have participated in a CNM relationship

Question 49

two types of lovers in polyamory

Answer 49

primary & secondary

Question 50

primary lover

Answer 50

the person they’ve been with longer, they often live together, share finances, are married, have children, and enjoy greater compassion, security, and nurturance

Question 51

secondary lover

Answer 51

afforded less time and effort, but enjoy greater eroticism and passion

Question 52

attitudes towards CNM

Answer 52

Most people disapprove of CNM relationships

Question 53

satisfaction in CNM relationships

Answer 53

- CNM relationships are on average, just as satisfying as monogamous ones - CNM participants enjoy higher sexual satisfaction

Question 54

sexual desire of men vs. women

Answer 54

- Men have higher sex drives on average than women do - They masturbate more often, want sex more often, want to begin having sex sooner, think about sex more often, spend more money on sex, and are more accepting of casual sex

Question 55

impacts of discrepancies in sexual desires

Answer 55

Sexual satisfaction suffers when there’s a discrepancy in sexual desire between members of a couple

Question 56

when do women experience drops in sexual desire?

Answer 56

after having a child or when going through menopause

Question 57

prevalence of safe sex

Answer 57

Many people do not use condoms when they have sex with a new or temporary partner

Question 58

The illusion of unique invulnerability

Answer 58

we believe bad things are more likely to happen to others than use

Question 59

Alcohol myopia

Answer 59

the reduction of people’s abilities to think about and process information available to them when they’re intoxicated

Question 60

pluralistic ignorance

Answer 60

people wrongly believe that their feelings and beliefs are different from those of others

Question 61

Why do people have unsafe sex?

Answer 61

- They underestimate the risk - The illusion of unique invulnerability - Faulty decision-making (often caused by sexual arousal) - Intoxication - Pluralistic ignorances - Inequalities in power - Abstinence education - Low self-control - Decreased intimacy and pleasure

Question 62

stealthing

Answer 62

surreptitiously removing a condom just before or during intercourse without one’s partner’s knowledge or consent

Question 63

sexual satifaction in couples

Answer 63

When people are in good health, free of sexual problems, and have a steady partner, most people have happy sex

Question 64

sexual satisfaction in midlife and beyond

Answer 64

A minority of Americans 45 and older and having satisfying sex

Question 65

How can we attain more sexual satisfaction?

Answer 65

- Focus on the quality of one’s partners rather than the quantity - In general, the more sex a couple has, the more satisfied with their sex lives both of them tend to be - If they’re having sex at least once a week, having sex more often doesn’t make them any happier with their relationship - Focus on our needs for autonomy, relatedness, and competence

Question 66

self-determination theory

Answer 66

we are happiest and healthiest when we fulfill our needs for autonomy, relatedness, and competence

Question 67

autonomy

Answer 67

routinely engaging in activities that allow us to choose and control our own actions

Question 68

relatedness

Answer 68

routinely engaging in activities that allow us to establish close connections with others

Question 69

competence

Answer 69

routinely engaging in activities that allow us to feel confident and capable

Question 70

penis size and sexual satisfaction

Answer 70

Most women are satisfied with their partner’s penis size

Question 71

impact of traditional gender roles on sexual satisfaction

Answer 71

Traditional gender roles can rob women of their autonomy in bed, which reduces sexual satisfaction for both men and women

Question 72

motivation and sexual satisfaction

Answer 72

- Sex is more satisfying when people and their partners engage in it for approach reasons - People who believe that sexual success is malleable have more satisfying sex - Sexual satisfaction increases when couples intentionally make time and space for sex, seek to pleasure their partners, and introduce fun and novel activities

Question 73

importance of sexual communication

Answer 73

Clear communication about sex is associated with better sexual functioning

Question 74

communication in homosexual couples

Answer 74

Homosexual couples have better communication during sex, and hence, better sex

Question 75

misconstructing sexual desire

Answer 75

- Men perceive signs of sexual flirtatiousness that aren’t intended - Men who reject traditional gender roles and value equality make fewer of these mistakes - Men who have unrestricted sociosexual orientations make more of these mistakes

Question 76

estimating women's sexual desire study

Answer 76

- When couples start living together, men begin to underestimate women’s sexual desire - This is assocaited with greater marital satisfaction for the wives

Question 77

sexual satisfaction and relationship satisfaction

Answer 77

- Sexual satisfaction and relationship satisfaction go hand-in-hand - They are subject to similar influences like similarity and perceived partner responsiveness - Fulfilling sex makes a partnership more gratifying and love makes sex more rewarding in return

Question 78

attachment and sexuality

Answer 78

- Avoidants have less frequent sex with their romantic parnters - Those who are high in attachment anxiety have more passionate, needier sex that springs from their desire to feel accepted by their partners - Those high in attachment anxiety are more likely to have casual sex and extramarital affairs - Secure partners are most satisfied with their sex lives, likely because they are more honest and open in discussing their needs with their partners

Question 79

four types of sexual violation

Answer 79

1. verbal coercion resulting in fondling 2. verbal coercison resulting in intercourse 3. physical force resulting in fondling 4. physical force resulting in intercourse

Question 80

prevalence of sexual coercison by gender

Answer 80

- Most men and women never direct any of these forms of sexual coercion towards anyone - Men are more likely to use physical force than women do - Women are just as likely as men to verbally coerce reluctant partners to have unwanted intercourse

Question 81

Ways to reduce the frequency of sexual coercion:

Answer 81

- Beware of potential partners who view sex as a contest - Beware of intoxication in either you or your partner - Resolve to assertively resist unwanted advances - Set sexual boundaries with frank, direct discussion - Think of your lover as an equal partner whose preferences are just as important as your own